I see Joe Navarro. I see what you're thinking

Joe Navarro, Marvin Carlins

I see what you're thinking

To my grandmother Adeline, whose kind, wrinkled hands lovingly molded a boy into a man.

Joe Navarro

To my wife Edith, who gave me her love and showed me what it means to be a caring person.

Marvin Carlins

Preface

I see what you're thinking

The man sat at the table opposite the FBI agent and patiently, carefully choosing his words, answered questions. He was not considered the main suspect in the murder case. His alibi was plausible, his answers sounded sincere, but the agent was in no hurry to complete the interrogation. With the suspect's consent, he was asked a series of questions about the murder weapon:

“If you had to commit this crime, would you choose to use a gun?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use a pocketknife?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use an ice pick?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use a hammer?”

One of the listed items, an ice pick, was indeed used to commit this crime, but this information has so far been hidden from the public. Therefore, only the killer could know which item became the crime weapon. While listing them down the list, the FBI agent kept a close eye on the suspect. When the turn came to the ice pick, the man’s eyelids dropped heavily over his eyes and did not rise until the next item was named. The agent immediately understood what this eyelid behavior meant, and from that moment on, the “minor” suspect became the main object of the investigation. After some time, he confessed to committing the crime.

Another victory in the record of Joe Navarro, a remarkable man whose twenty-five-year brilliant career in the FBI, in addition to this killer, had dozens of other exposed criminals, including seasoned spies. How did he manage to bring them to light? If you ask him about this, he frankly admits: “I just know how to read people.”

The fact is that Joe has devoted his entire professional life to the research, development and application of the science of non-verbal, that is, non-speech, means of communication. All these means - facial expressions, gestures and physical movements (kinesics), body position (proxemics), touch (heptics) and even clothing - help to understand what people are thinking, how they intend to act, and how much their words correspond to the truth. This is bad news for criminals, terrorists and spies, for whom no amount of tricks can help hide from his attentive gaze the expressive nonverbal signals of their body (“emblems”) that reveal their thoughts and intentions.

On the other hand, this is very good news for you, dear readers, because Joe will willingly share with you his knowledge of nonverbal speech, which helped him become an outstanding "spy hunter", "living lie detector" and instructor at the FBI Academy. He will do this so that you can better understand the feelings, thoughts and intentions of those around you. In this wonderful book, Joe teaches you how to observe, recognize, and decipher people's nonverbal behavior so you can interact more successfully with them. Equally useful in professional, social and personal life, this knowledge will greatly enrich your life and make it more interesting.

Just fifteen years ago, the scientific community would have been hostile to much of what Joe talks about in this book. Only the most recent advances in brain scanning and functional neuroimaging technology have been able to confirm the validity of the behaviors he described. Using the latest discoveries in psychology, neuroscience, medicine, sociology, criminology, communication theory and anthropology, plus a quarter century of experience applying the science of nonverbal communication to the professional work of an FBI special agent, Joe is the ideal mentor for anyone who wants to succeed in mastering the secrets of nonverbal communication. communications. His competence and qualifications are recognized throughout the world. In addition to regular appearances on popular programs on leading television channels, he continues to conduct seminars on nonverbal communication for employees of the FBI, CIA and other agencies of the US intelligence community. His consulting services are used by banks, insurance companies and large law firms in the United States and other countries. In addition, Joe teaches at Saint Leo University in Florida and at many medical schools across America, where his unique ability to understand the intricacies of nonverbal communication is sought after by an appreciative audience, including many physicians who are willing to use new, unconventional methods to quickly and accurately diagnose patients. Joe's combination of academic knowledge, professional experience, and skillful ability to analyze nonverbal communication signals in real-life critical situations makes him one of the foremost experts in the field, as you will see as you read this book.

Working with Joe, attending his seminars, and applying his ideas to my own life, I can confidently say that the material contained in these pages marks a huge step forward in our understanding of the essence of nonverbal communication. I say this as a professional psychologist who agreed to participate in this book only because I was intrigued by Joe's bold attempt to use the science of nonverbal communication to achieve professional goals and success in his personal life.

In addition, I was very impressed by his informed and careful approach to the topic. For example, when Joe talks about how observing nonverbal cues allows one to “correctly read” many behaviors, he is careful to caution that using body language to recognize deception is a particularly difficult and complex task. This extremely important point, which is rarely taken into account by lay people and law enforcement officials, reminds us to think very carefully before making a judgment about the honesty or dishonesty of a person based on his nonverbal behavior.

Joe Navarro-Former FBI agent, today an independent consultant and specialist in the field of Sign Language. Today, two of his books “Louder Than Words” have been translated into Russian. How to understand nonverbal signals" and "I see what you are thinking."

His website www.JNforensics.com. He also writes the “Spycatcher” column for Joe Navarro.

I confess... This is the first serious article that I was able to translate from English. And since this is a “test of the pen”, if you see an opportunity to improve the translation, I will be very grateful for your comments.

In any case, I will finalize the translation, but I see no point in hiding the version in the form in which it is presented now from your attention.

So, the article...

Joe Navarro "What Shoulders Say About Us"

The most overlooked part of the body conveys information most subtly. All we need to do is observe. Publication Joe Navarro, May 26, 2012 in " Spycatcher."

I remember when I was still a child my mother said: stand straight, shoulders back, chin up. What I didn't realize was that I was communicating a lot to her through my posture and gestures. I would silently let her know, “I’m having a bad day today because my friends couldn’t come out and play with me.” Perhaps she learned it from her mother, or perhaps she learned it from classical ballet school, but she intuitively read my body language and used it when addressing me. Who knows, maybe this was my first lesson about wordless shoulder communication, or at least it was the beginning. I discuss this because when I look back on my life, I realize that there has not been a day when I did not use the information I received from watching their shoulders to understand other people.

While much of the literature focuses on the face, I believe it is more valuable to focus on what the shoulders tell us about us. They are very rarely mentioned in the literature on nonverbal communication, and if you ask people about it, they will just shrug their shoulders and this is very paradoxical. After all, the shoulders are always in sight, they are prominent, our clothes are on them, they form our image in the eyes of other people and they express our health and emotions, they help us in communication, but most people simply ignore them.

Desmond Morris, a famous zoologist, and David Givens, a famous anthropologist, explained why broad and muscular shoulders, such as those of the statue of David, express strength and courage. This was also especially appreciated by the Greeks, as their Kauros shows, the statue of a young man with the figure of “ V "type. It may be definitely genetic, as Morris argues, that we associate all the positive masculine qualities with someone who has such a mesomorphic " V “-shaped” body type (broad shoulders and narrow pelvis). This may explain why women swoon when David Beckham takes off his shirt. In this case, according to David Givens, shoulders speak of health, vitality, i.e. about an evolutionary perspective, and therefore " V -shaped body type" will be a biological advantage when choosing a partner.

We are subconsciously drawn to this " V -shaped” shape, so often men’s jackets are additionally specially padded on the shoulders to ensure the achievement of this image. One day, I overheard a tailor talking to a client about how he could add extra padding to his shoulders if he wanted: this was the tailor's advice to a man who, unfortunately, had a pear-shaped figure.

Shoulders indicate vitality, but can also indicate dominance and hierarchy. Over the course of my career, I have interviewed many criminals and I always asked them how they defined a victim before committing a crime. Time and time again, 3 things stood out: the way their victims looked (frail, weak, unathletic), their absolute situational awareness (the criminals never went after those who saw them first), and their hand movements (decisive or passive). As Robert Hehr argues, shoulders seem to be a key factor for the criminal, who is essentially an intraspecies predator and views other people as prey. As one psychopath told me, and it is very eloquent: “A strong predator will never hunt another strong object, he will choose someone else.”

No matter which military man you watch, one thing will always stand out - their shoulders say: I am a leader, look at me, follow me. It is both part of the established hierarchy and the way we show respect. This is especially evident at the “Tomb of the Unknown Soldier” at Arlington Cemetery, where pride and respect are expressed in the posture of those who tirelessly guard the graves. Even during hurricanes, these soldiers stand straight as bayonets, with their shoulders drawn back, indicating that they highly value the sanctity of the sacrifice of the unknown soldiers. You won't find stooped soldiers here, and this simple behavior, in itself, speaks volumes.

Shoulders help us show respect and deference, but they also help us show happiness and joy. Belly dancers in Beirut move their shoulders in the same way as samba dancers in Bahia - it is a global way to show sensuality and joy. Dancing around the world is a celebration of the human soul, which is invariably expressed in the movement of the shoulders. What would Carnival in Brazil be without the rhythmic movement of the shoulders?

In dance, the shoulders effectively reveal what is on the heart and mind. But they can also be used as an indicator of depression. Several years ago, a well-known psychiatrist in Washington, DC, shared with me a very valuable technique. He said, “I see so many depressed patients, and even before they open their mouths, I can see it in their slumped, heavy shoulders—virtually immobile.” And, of course, he was right.

Years later, I dealt with individuals who were diagnosed with clinical depression. In each such case, I could see their problems in their shoulders: they lack spontaneous movement because... shoulders weighed down with the burden of their ailments. And while a child who comes home from school has slumped shoulders for only a few minutes out of an hour, in the case of clinical depression this can last for months throughout the year. And if this is not corrected in time, this form will become stable.

Without even realizing it, we use our shoulders every day to convey information and manifest what we think. If someone asks us “How to get to the freeway?” and we immediately shrug our shoulders, raising them quickly and decisively, then we are saying, “I really don’t know.” There is no need to communicate anything else - here or in Borneo, it is a universal signal. If we decide to respond with words, then most likely we will also shrug our shoulders to reinforce the message. We do this because it gives special meaning to our words. This quick movement of the shoulders, in defiance of gravity, gives a special positive meaning to what we want to express. When we see nonverbal confirmation of words, it looks more convincing.

Over the years, after conducting thousands of interviews, one of the things that I came to empirically through observation, and which, unfortunately, is not described in the literature, was how the shoulders behave when a person is not convinced enough in his words or shamelessly deceives. I have found that when people talk about something they are unsure about, their shoulders reflect that uncertainty. For example, someone says, “I'm sure he wasn't here yesterday,” and you see the shoulders or one shoulder rise very slightly or slowly. This muffled or slow upward movement of the shoulders says, "I'm not confident enough in what I'm saying."

Clinic doctors find it very helpful when talking to patients to ask the question: “Are you going to take the drugs that I prescribed for you?” And then, if patients give a response along with a slight, slight rise in the shoulder, doctors know something is wrong. As one primary care doctor told me: “Invariably, they don't want to say what's on their mind, and that they don't like or don't want to take these medications, or they think it will upset their stomach. But before they answer, they will show this by moving their shoulder or lifting it slightly.” For an attentive clinician, this is a reason to ask, “Do you already have experience using this medication, have you had any problems with it?” Watching the shoulders rise slowly and carefully is enough reason to ask even more questions.

Raising the shoulders in itself is not an indication of deception or cheating (as it is not a clear indicator of deception) and should not be interpreted as such, but it does demonstrate a lack of confidence. This can serve as a warning that the person is not telling us all the information. For example, if a manager asks, “Can you do this by Tuesday?” and the person answers “Yes”, but his one shoulder rises slowly, it can be assumed that there is some kind of problem. Then my next question would be “Could anything be a barrier to getting this done on time?” And then you hear “Okay, I have two children who are sick now and...” and you realize why this person subconsciously manifested himself in this way. As I said in my book Louder Than Words, “the body reveals what the mind hides.”

As I said at the very beginning and as I have written elsewhere, shoulders are always visible, but we rarely look at them, and when we do, we don't focus on the message they send us. The next time you observe people, pay enough attention to the shoulders, especially the shoulders of children, whose body language is true because what is in their heart and mind is true. And at least out of respect for our parents, stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, because... it shapes your image in the eyes of others.

Translated from English by O. G. Belosheev according to the publication: WHAT EVERY BODY IS SAYING (An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People) by Joe Navarro with Marvin Karlins.

© 2008 by Robert Joe Navarro

© Translation. Edition in Russian. Decor. LLC "Potpourri", 2012.

To my grandmother Adeline, whose kind, wrinkled hands lovingly molded a boy into a man.

Joe Navarro

To my wife Edith, who gave me her love and showed me what it means to be a caring person.

Marvin Carlins

Marvin Carlins, psychologist

The man sat at the table opposite the FBI agent and patiently, carefully choosing his words, answered questions. He was not considered the main suspect in the murder case. His alibi was plausible, his answers sounded sincere, but the agent was in no hurry to complete the interrogation. With the suspect's consent, he was asked a series of questions about the murder weapon:

“If you had to commit this crime, would you choose to use a gun?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use a pocketknife?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use an ice pick?”

“If you had to commit this crime, would you prefer to use a hammer?”

One of the listed items, an ice pick, was indeed used to commit this crime, but this information has so far been hidden from the public. Therefore, only the killer could know which item became the crime weapon. While listing them down the list, the FBI agent kept a close eye on the suspect. When the turn came to the ice pick, the man’s eyelids dropped heavily over his eyes and did not rise until the next item was named. The agent immediately understood what this eyelid behavior meant, and from that moment on, the “minor” suspect became the main object of the investigation. After some time, he confessed to committing the crime.

Another victory in the record of Joe Navarro, a remarkable man whose twenty-five-year brilliant career in the FBI, in addition to this killer, had dozens of other exposed criminals, including seasoned spies. How did he manage to bring them to light? If you ask him about this, he frankly admits: “I just know how to read people.”

The fact is that Joe has devoted his entire professional life to the research, development and application of the science of non-verbal, that is, non-speech, means of communication. All of these tools—facial expressions, gestures and physical movements (kinesics), body position (proxemics), touch (heptics), and even clothing—help us understand what people are thinking, how they intend to act, and the extent to which their words are true. This is bad news for criminals, terrorists and spies, for whom no amount of tricks can help hide from his attentive gaze the expressive nonverbal signals of their body (“emblems”) that reveal their thoughts and intentions.

On the other hand, this is very good news for you, dear readers, because Joe will willingly share with you his knowledge of nonverbal speech, which helped him become an outstanding "spy hunter", "living lie detector" and instructor at the FBI Academy. He will do this so that you can better understand the feelings, thoughts and intentions of those around you. In this wonderful book, Joe teaches you how to observe, recognize, and decipher people's nonverbal behavior so you can interact more successfully with them. Equally useful in professional, social and personal life, this knowledge will greatly enrich your life and make it more interesting.

Just fifteen years ago, the scientific community would have been hostile to much of what Joe talks about in this book. Only the most recent advances in brain scanning and functional neuroimaging technology have been able to confirm the validity of the behaviors he described. Using the latest discoveries in psychology, neuroscience, medicine, sociology, criminology, communication theory and anthropology, plus a quarter century of experience applying the science of nonverbal communication to the professional work of an FBI special agent, Joe is the ideal mentor for anyone who wants to succeed in mastering the secrets of nonverbal communication. communications. His competence and qualifications are recognized throughout the world. In addition to regular appearances on popular programs on leading television channels, he continues to conduct seminars on nonverbal communication for employees of the FBI, CIA and other agencies of the US intelligence community. His consulting services are used by banks, insurance companies and large law firms in the United States and other countries. In addition, Joe teaches at Saint Leo University in Florida and at many medical schools across America, where his unique ability to understand the intricacies of nonverbal communication is sought after by an appreciative audience, including many physicians who are willing to use new, unconventional methods to quickly and accurately diagnose patients. Joe's combination of academic knowledge, professional experience, and skillful ability to analyze nonverbal communication signals in real-life critical situations makes him one of the foremost experts in the field, as you will see as you read this book.

Working with Joe, attending his seminars, and applying his ideas to my own life, I can confidently say that the material contained in these pages marks a huge step forward in our understanding of the essence of nonverbal communication. I say this as a professional psychologist who agreed to participate in this book only because I was intrigued by Joe's bold attempt to use the science of nonverbal communication to achieve professional goals and success in his personal life.

In addition, I was very impressed by his informed and careful approach to the topic. For example, when Joe talks about how observing nonverbal cues allows you to “correctly read” many behaviors, he is careful to caution that using body language to recognize deception is a particularly difficult and complex task. This extremely important point, which is rarely taken into account by lay people and law enforcement officials, reminds us to think very carefully before making a judgment about the honesty or dishonesty of a person based on his nonverbal behavior.

Unlike many other books on nonverbal behavior, which are based on personal opinions and speculative reasoning, the information presented here is based on scientific facts and field-tested findings. In addition, the book pays special attention to an aspect that is often ignored by other authors, and details the extremely important role that the limbic system of the brain plays in human nonverbal behavior and how important it is to take this role into account in order to correctly understand and effectively use significant nonverbal signals.

Silent body language awaits those who want to master it. If you are motivated to study nonverbal behavior cues by wanting to climb the corporate ladder or simply by wanting to build better relationships with friends and family, then this book is just for you. If you want to reach a professional level, you will need to carefully study all of the following chapters plus be willing to spend quite a lot of time and energy to master and apply the proposed methods in your daily life.

Body language is universal, informative and sincere. When trying to “read” a person, you need to carefully observe him and not make hasty conclusions.
Our legs, arms, fingers, torso and face are a storehouse of non-verbal signals. Some gestures are universal, others are individual. From childhood, people learn to control facial expressions, while the legs are the least controlled parts of the body and therefore the most honest

Joe Novarro - About the Author

Joe Novarro is a nonverbal communication expert and former FBI agent. Joe teaches at the University of Florida. Joe Navarro first started thinking about nonverbal behavior at the age of eight, when his family was deported from Cuba and moved to the United States. The boy did not know a word of English, and at first he had to communicate with teachers and classmates mainly in sign language.
Joe immediately noticed that people who were friendly raised their eyebrows, while those who were hostile narrowed their eyes. Later, when he became an FBI agent, Mr. Navarro widely used his knowledge and observations of nonverbal behavior of people to solve crimes.

Book Review I See What You're Thinking

Nonverbal behavior

Nonverbal behavior or body language is the way information is conveyed through non-verbal means such as facial expressions, gestures, touch, body movements, posture, tone, timbre and volume of voice.

10 Commandments of Observing and Deciphering Signals

1. Carefully observe what is happening around you.
2. Remember that observing in context is the key to understanding nonverbal behavior.
3. Learn to recognize and decipher universal signals of nonverbal behavior.
4. Learn to recognize and decipher individual signals of nonverbal behavior.
5. When communicating with people, try to determine their basic behavior patterns.
6. Try to notice multiple emblems in people - behavioral signals that are given simultaneously or sequentially.
7. Remember to look for changes in a person’s behavior that indicate a change in feelings, mood and/or intentions.
8. Diligently learn to recognize false nonverbal signals.
9. Remember that the ability to distinguish between signs of comfort and discomfort plays a critical role in deciphering nonverbal messages.
10. Try to observe people discreetly.

What do different parts of the body say?

Most people start observing from the face, despite the fact that it is this part of the body that helps people hide their true feelings. Joe Navarro argues that you should start observing a person not from the upper part of the body, but from the lower one.

Legs

Feet are the most honest part of the body. “Happy feet” are an emblem of confidence, a sign that a person got what he wanted, was happy with the news received: feet and legs move in different directions in the same place, stamping with excitement. Even if the other person's feet are under the table, you can recognize "happy feet" by looking at the person's shoulders and chest: the fabric on the shirt will move up and down. By the position of the feet, you can determine whether a person wants to communicate with you: the upper part of the body can be turned towards you, while the face will express sincere interest, but if the foot is turned to the side, this means that the person is trying to leave faster.
Widely spaced legs are a type of “territorial” behavior that indicates that a person feels like the master of the situation; at the same time, closed feet are a sign of submission.

Torso

Many elements of the body's behavior express genuine feelings. Since the torso contains many vital organs, such as the heart, lungs and liver, it is natural that the brain will try to protect this part of the body from any dangers and threats. The chest of a person experiencing stress begins to rise and fall strongly and frequently. If such breathing is observed in a physically healthy person, it is worth considering what is the reason for such strong anxiety. Shoulders can show weakness: if, in response to a negative statement or event, the shoulders slowly rise towards the ears, it means that the person feels uncomfortable and, like a turtle, tries to hide his head. This is often the behavior of children who are being reprimanded by their parents, or employees who are being scolded by their boss.

Hands

According to Joe Navarro, experts on nonverbal behavior unfairly ignore the hands, focusing only on the hands and fingers. However, the upper limbs are excellent transmitters of emotions. The author recalls his experience in identifying shoplifters: they differed from ordinary customers mainly in that they tried to gesticulate as little as possible so as not to attract attention to themselves.
By observing a person over a long period of time, you can determine his individual baseline behavior pattern, and the movements of his hands in a given situation will inform you about how he feels.
Isolating hand gestures, such as putting your hands behind your back, mean "move away, don't touch me."
Territorial gestures include: spreading the elbows, leaning on a nearby chair, the “hood” pose - a person leans back on a chair, clasping his hands behind his head (demonstration of strength and superiority) and pressing his elbows to the lower back (weakness, uncertainty). Our brains are still programmed to use our hands as a means of communicating emotions, thoughts and feelings. For this reason, whether people use words or not, hand gestures deserve close attention as a source of nonverbal information that helps us understand the thoughts and feelings of other people.

Hands are of great importance in the communication process: expressive hand movements evoke a positive reaction in people, while the desire to hide their hands, on the contrary, can raise doubts about sincerity. There are many hand signals that help determine how a person is feeling. When we are stressed, a powerful surge of adrenaline causes our hands and fingers to shake uncontrollably, and our hands may also shake when we hear, see or think about things that could have negative consequences. Positive emotions can also cause trembling of hands that hold a lucky lottery ticket or a winning combination of cards in poker.

Face

Our facial expressions function better than other means of communication as a universal human language.

The eyes are the least controlled part of the face: the pupil reflexively narrows, protecting the eyes from bright light, and the eyes quickly close when a dangerous object approaches them. When we are excited, surprised, or suddenly confronted with something unexpected, our eyes open wider and our pupils dilate to let in more light and send as much visual information to the brain as possible. This start reflex has served us well for many millennia. However, the brain quickly processes information - and if it considers it negative, the pupils will immediately constrict. There are various facial signals that the authors believe are highly informative: a wrinkled forehead and/or furrowed brow indicate anxiety, sadness, confusion, or anger; dilated nostrils indicate an excited state. A change in complexion also speaks volumes: redness of the face occurs when a person is caught doing something forbidden, his personal space is suddenly violated, or he is partial to someone and tries to hide it; and sudden pallor occurs if a person is shocked.

How to recognize deception

When observing a person, you should first pay attention to the consistency and expressiveness of nonverbal behavior.
Coherence is one of the manifestations of a person’s comfortable state. It is necessary to monitor the consistency between verbal and nonverbal messages, between the circumstances of the current moment and what the object of observation is saying, between events and emotions, and even the consistency of time and space. A typical example of a lack of coherence is the behavior of a person who states, “I didn’t do it,” while his head nods affirmatively. If people catch themselves making this mistake, they immediately change the direction of their head movements, trying to correct the situation.

When we speak, we use different parts of the body to emphasize points that evoke strong emotions in us. Observing expressive behavior is very important because expressiveness is a universal sign of sincerity in people, it is the contribution of the limbic brain to the process of communication, a way of letting others know how strong our feelings are. Liars tend to use their cognitive brain to decide what to say and how to deceive, but rarely think about how to present the lie.

Joe Navarro, in his book I See What You're Thinking, notes that detecting lies is incredibly difficult. Since there are no reliable signals that you are a deceiver, it is worth paying attention to the signs of discomfort that the person shows: it is difficult to remain calm when you are hiding something. Characteristics such as consistency and expressiveness of speech and behavior are also indicators of lying: if the interlocutor is not hiding anything, then he calmly and consistently states his version, accompanying his speech with natural gestures

Who is the book for? I See What You're Thinking About?

The book “I See What You're Thinking” can be useful both to specialists who work with people (doctors, teachers, investigators) and to a wide range of readers interested in psychology and seeking to better understand others. The book will be a great addition to your library.

Video from the author of the book I See What You're Thinking - Joe Navarro

Joe Navarro is a former FBI agent with 25 years of experience. He was once nicknamed a walking lie detector and now he reveals secrets, what to pay attention to and what exactly this or that gesture means.

The book is interesting to read for general development. The author writes that if you start noticing the signals, you will soon see them at every step. I admit honestly, I didn’t read the book as “read the chapter, apply it for a week - watch the eyes/hands/feet of your colleagues and people around you.” It would be better remembered that way, of course.

By the way, you can use the acquired skills in interviews! The author himself gives examples of some interviews when, thanks to certain signals, a little more was revealed. For example: a girl was asked if she wanted to fly on business trips and her feet began to dance. This speaks of joyful excitement. And then they specified the city and, although the girl answered “Yes, of course,” her feet literally grew into the ground, stopping dancing. They clarified and found out that the girl was thinking about a completely different city, where she had friends.

You can also gauge a candidate's true thoughts when they happily chirp about how much they love writing test cases or documentation.

Oh, and it can also be used in negotiations! If you notice the reaction to the reading of the clauses of the contract, you will see which clauses cause disgust. The reaction may be fleeting (curl your mouth, for example), the person may not say anything, but he will still have an aftertaste. Or we can discuss this topic in more detail and find a solution that will please everyone.

But there is one important BUT, and the author constantly emphasizes this. This or that behavior does not mean at all that the person is 100% lying to you! It is possible that he is simply experiencing stress. Or he's like that in real life.

That is why we must first look not at a specific gesture, but at the dynamics. That is, if a person always jerks his hands and fiddles with something, then this is his normal state. And it is necessary to notice the differences from the normal state. And still, deviations will not clearly indicate a lie. Sometimes you just have to dig a little deeper.

It turns out that almost any part of the body can “give you away”. And it's not just the eyes and face. Quite the contrary, we are taught to lie from childhood. “Eat your porridge and don’t frown!”, “Smile at your aunt,” and so on. So our hands, feet, etc. are much more truthful.

Happiness well reflects the desire to overcome gravity. When a person is happy, he actively waves his arms and tries to lift his feet off the ground - this could be dancing or simply lifting on his toes.

When a person experiences stress, the shirt collar pulls away. Oh, by the way, the neck is an area that we especially actively protect. If we feel comfortable around a person, we may open our necks. But try to enter an elevator with a stranger and tilt your head while looking at him: you won’t be able to stand for that long, it will be too uncomfortable. Likewise, if you know a person, but you don’t like him.

And if a girl is scared, then she covers the dimple under her throat - where they usually wear a cross. This is an involuntary movement of the hand. And you can also encounter this behavior in the same elevator with a stranger. We don’t know what to expect from him, involuntarily defending ourselves.

Everyone probably already knows where the feet point. If we are interested in talking to a person, then we turn our feet towards him. Otherwise, we can kind of politely say hello by turning our body slightly, and our feet will be facing where they were before. This means that you are not very welcome in this company))

Or an interesting example about digestion. Has it ever happened that after an argument at dinner, indigestion began? This is how the body prepares for the “freeze-flight-fight” reaction. The limbic system stops the processes of nutrition and digestion, preparing the body to escape.

And there are a lot of such little things in the book. At the same time, it is quite easy to read and interesting, written in simple language. It's small, the font is quite large, the pages just fly =))

It is captivating because the author is not trying to impose the idea “Read my book and learn to spot a liar.” On the contrary, he condemns such advertising. Because there is no way to 100% figure out whether lies or stress are playing a role. But the “tricks and tricks” are quite useful. So I highly recommend the book!