Phrases to convince a person. A simple technique, how to easily and naturally convince a person


The modern world is the art of communication. Most of your life depends on how you know how to communicate with others and get what you want from them. This applies to personal life, friends and career. Your opponents will be different, but the ability to win and convince the interlocutor in disputes will definitely come in handy for you.

How to convince people with words and achieve what you want?

To become closer to a person. Show how much you have in common with the interlocutor. These can be similar interests, opinions, hobbies, interests. Compliment or flatter gently. It is much easier to convince a person who feels like you and has sympathy.

Make the person his due. Treat a man with coffee today, give him a little present or do him a favor. Tomorrow you can ask for a return favor. The person will feel morally indebted to you.

Speak quickly and confidently. Use eloquence to convince the other person. Don't be shy about the flow of words. Speech speed indicates confidence in the speaker's words. Use arguments, facts, exaggerations, metaphors.

Take advantage of weak points. Each person has not only armor, but also weak points. Press on nobility, pity, a sense of duty, fame, fame, conceit, selfishness, generosity, kindness and other instincts. You can convince a person by finding the right key.

Ask for more. Ask a person for $ 100 in debt. He will most likely refuse, but he will feel guilty. Then ask him for 10 dollars. He will fulfill this request. Always ask for more in order to get less.

Choose the right time. Timing is everything. If a person is out of sorts, busy or does not want to speak, then it is better not even to start. Start talking when the person is in the mood, happy, or on the rise. So you will more likely achieve what you want.

It is not necessary to argue with the interlocutor. Do you want to convince a person, but he says the opposite? Agree, after that the opponent will not be so belligerent. Do not argue directly, but vaguely agree, and then continue to insist and bend your line.

Be assertive in persuading. Sometimes we do not listen to more experienced people, but to more assertive people. Active and persuasive people inspire confidence. Be persistent and don't back down.

Give something in return. When you want to convince a person or ask, then you need to give something in return. What does the person want to receive and what value can you offer? Motivate the interlocutor. This way you will be more likely to convince your opponent.

Make them agree. Have the person say the word "yes" several times. After that, people are more positive and willing to agree with a lot.

Don't get into quarrel or conflict. How to get what you want? Stay calm even if the atmosphere starts to boil. The one who succumbs to emotions loses.

Control your body language. It is worth watching not only your tongue, but also your body. Often people do not listen to us so much as they look at the behavior of the interlocutor and draw conclusions. Be open in conversation. Do not cross your arms and legs, do not pinch or slouch. Maintain eye contact and smile.

When you learn to convince people with words, then life will be radically better.

1. Reaction to kindness or the Benjamin Franklin effect.

The story tells how Benjamin Franklin befriended a man who really didn't like him. This man was looking for a rare book that Franklin had. When Benjamin found out about this, he borrowed this book, and when it was returned to the owner, Benjamin simply thanked him. As a result, they became best friends.

Franklin always said: “Those to whom you have benefited once will be willing to give much more than you offered” ...

2. Ask for more than you actually want to receive.

This idea is very simple and akin to trading the market. It will always work for you. You must increase your needs if you are of interest to someone. First, it is most likely that you will be rejected. Don't give up and give the person some time. In 95% of cases, the person who is interested in you will eventually answer and offer a little less than you originally asked for, but in the end it will be more than you originally wanted.

3. Conditional desire to help.

This idea is similar to the previous one. To get someone to have a genuine and deliberate desire to help you, ask them to do something for you one day that they are not able to do at that moment. Be sure you have created a person for yourself who will feel obligated to you. Most likely, they will be tempted to help you at any time because they will feel guilty about not helping you the first time.

4. Always flatter.

Flatter is ubiquitous. Learn to understand that flattery needs to look natural, or it can bring more negative results than positive ones.

If you are trying to flatter someone with more self-esteem, then you have more opportunities for success. People of this type love themselves and love flattery, and they don't seem to notice it. But those with little self-esteem may see deception when you try to make them feel better than they are.

5. Mirror.

When you want to please someone, try to imitate him. People with such traits are called chameleons in society, it is noteworthy how they constantly change and adapt to each new person they meet. However, this skill can be a useful tool to attract the right people who are of interest to you.

This principle is very common among comedians and parodists. All the celebrities who have been parodied on TV are often good friends with these actors and comedians.

6. Ask for mercy from those who are tired.

When someone is tired, he or she is more responsive to your requests. The secret is that when people get tired, they are not only physically exhausted, but often mentally as well. If your boss is tired, he or she can easily let you finish your work the next day, which you must finish on time today. At the same time, surprisingly, you will receive more respect and praise from your boss. Mainly because you kept your promise.

7. Start with a small request.

Just ask for a small request at the beginning and you will likely open the door to more credit. According to this principle, people often become addicted to volunteering. For example, you may first be asked to take part in an anti-deforestation movement that you support, then you will respond to more and more requests. It's a small benefit, but you train gradually to give more. Suddenly, you are ready to support efforts against deforestation in faraway Tanzania or join a green party and contribute. And in the end, all these people go to the rallies with transporters that are very far from their original volunteer aspirations.

8. Don't try to fix people who are not fixable.

In his world famous book, Dale Carnegie suggests not to scold people for their obvious human mistakes, at least not when you first discovered them. If you are concerned about the wrongness of other people, be careful about it. Even if you come across a whiner who blames everyone for his failures, don't yell at him in the face. Try to agree with his opinion for the time being, and then gradually try to change that point of view. Otherwise, you risk becoming his worst enemy.

9. Repeat phrases and expressions of people that are important to you.

This principle is reminiscent of the "chameleon" principle, where people imitate the gestures and facial expressions of the person they are interested in or value. Words can be pleasing to the ear if they sound like echoes. Try to talk about what this person has already mentioned, that he has already lost in his head. If you want to know everything about the "chameleons" on the site, I will tell you.

10. Nods help.

Scientists have found that when people nod while listening to someone, they are most likely to agree with the speaker. They also found that when someone nods in front of the speaker, the person who speaks like a parrot repeats the same words over and over. Thus, nodding invokes the listener's unconditional agreement.

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Translation of an article from learning-mind.com
Translator GusenaLapchataya

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Hello dear readers! We have to convince people in different situations: at work, school, in personal life. Remember the last moment when you had to communicate with a person to win him over to your side. Was it easy for you? If you are reading this article, then most likely you have failed. But it is so important to know how to persuade a person correctly. But this skill can be easily learned. Therefore, today I want to talk about how to convince people in different life situations, what should definitely be emphasized and what exactly should be avoided.

If you want to master the skill of persuasion to perfection, then you cannot do without this book: Robert Cialdini " The psychology of influence. Convince. Take action. Protect yourself". It is she who reveals this topic in its entirety, in an understandable language, it provides clear and simple examples on which you can easily learn to convince anyone.

Power of persuasion

The ability to get a person to accept your position is extremely useful in various areas of life. Persuade. Agree with your lover to go to the cinema. Make a friend go on a diet together and so on. In all these situations, it is extremely important to understand how best to influence the interlocutor in order to persuade them to their opinion and push them to the actions you need.

If today it is extremely difficult for you with you, do not be discouraged and do not worry. This is a skill that can and should be developed every day, albeit in small portions. Start small and work your way up. Of course, you will most likely not be able to perform complex techniques right away, because this requires experience. That is why I warn you against haste.

What does it mean to convince another person? Give the necessary arguments, set an example, make you think in such a way as to direct the person's actions in the direction you need. It is extremely important to understand the real beliefs of the person himself.

Remember that all people do only what benefits them materially, mentally or morally. This is what your actions should be directed to. Show the person the benefits that he will receive.

The persuasion process depends on many factors. You need to win over only one person or a whole group to your side; you are trying to negotiate with your boss or your girlfriend; in front of you is a person or benevolent about your idea. All of this involves completely different tactics. Let's deal with each situation in more detail.

Persuasive speech

I want to start by preparing a speech. When you need to give a presentation of a new product to clients, or convince the board of directors in a new direction for your business, or an impressive speech in front of an examination committee. All of the principles below can also be useful in a personal conversation, when you only need to win over one person to your side.

The first principle is your understanding of the essence. In order to convince many, win over the majority, you need to clearly understand intentions and goals. If you are unsure of your belief, it will immediately catch your eye.

You don't have to just prove, you have to show the beauty of your idea and the benefits to the audience in front of which you are speaking. You will gain more trust if people see your confidence and determination.

The second no less important point is the structure of your speech. A poorly prepared speech will leave behind only a bitter aftertaste and disappointment in the speaker. Therefore, it is extremely important for you to learn how to properly plan your speech.

How should the performance be structured? First comes the introduction. It should be short, succinct and outline the essence of your further speech. You can immediately set a serious tone or start with a joke, which will give the performance an easier and more relaxed format.

After the introduction comes the main part. Emphasize how you speak. This is as important as what you say. Persuasive speech should be clear, easy to understand, logical and complete. Do not fuss, do not try to cram as many examples, evidence and arguments into the speech as possible. Stop at two or three of the most powerful and backed by reputable sources.

Break your speech into small blocks. Information is better absorbed in short and precise terms. Don't be afraid to ask the audience questions and feel free to answer the questions for you. But be careful, improvisation has its pitfalls. Therefore, try to think in advance what questions you may be asked.

And if you really have to improvise, then for preparation you cannot do without the article "".

In conclusion, briefly repeat the entire speech with the main theses, and make a main statement that should encourage people to take certain steps (buy your product, enroll in courses, and so on).

Useful tricks

Now let's talk about some of the tricks you can use to convince someone in private.
When you speak, pay close attention to your tongue. The same information can be served under completely different sauces. I invite you to think about the following two phrases: "I have no money" and "I am currently experiencing a little financial difficulty." How do you see the difference in these phrases?

When you win someone over to your side, try to use emotionally charged words. Poor and lackluster argumentation, even if well supported, will elicit much less response than emotional speech.

When you talk to a person, you can gain more confidence from him with the help of gestures and facial expressions. This is done in a simple and uncomplicated way - take his pose. When we are like a person, he subconsciously feels sympathy for us and trusts our words more. You can find out more about body language in the article "".

In the psychology of persuasion, there is a great trick that marketers use all over the place - creating visible scarcity. We all want to have something unique and special. Therefore, when a limited batch of any product is produced, the store is bursting with queues.

A useful example of long-term persuasion is exchange. In order to get what you want from a certain person, give him something. For example, lend a neighbor a drill, give your boss tickets to the opera, give a friend. By doing this, you oblige the person to answer you good for good. Don't overdo this trick.

Always remember to be honest and open. People are more inclined to trust the one who hides nothing, is benevolent and smiling. It is difficult to agree with someone who is gloomy, mutters something under his breath and does not cause positive emotions in general.

Reception "three yes". Start the conversation with two questions that the person will definitely answer in the affirmative: good weather today, yes; as I see you are a little tired today, huh? After that, the person will be inclined to answer the third question in the affirmative.

Never forget about the benefit that the person will receive by agreeing with you. You need to convince him not that he just needs to act in a certain way, but how much good he will get from this action.

Touching can sometimes work wonders. Light pat on the shoulder, gentle touch on the arm, elbow or forearm. All this will help you to forge closer and better with the person. Try not to overdo it with gestures like this. Firstly, each person has their own comfort zone, read about this in the article "", and secondly, your gesture may seem intrusive and will only push you away.

Be attentive to your interlocutor, speak briefly and to the point, praise the person, focus on the benefits for the person himself, do not push if you see clear disagreement.

How often do you have to convince people? Is it easy to agree with you? What can influence you so that you decide to change your point of view to the opposite?

Train and practice. Only then can you hone this skill to perfection.
Best wishes to you!

To be successful, to build relationships with colleagues, to arrange a personal life, it is important to know how to persuade people. Changing a person's position can be difficult, but there are various means of persuasion for this.

How to persuade a person: ways of speech influence

Persuasion is a form of psychological influence on a person, in which verbal or speech means play the main role: logic, clear argumentation, inferences, etc. There are several effective psychological techniques that increase the persuasiveness of speech, and often help to influence the interlocutor's subconscious.

Knowing how to persuade people will help you achieve your goals faster.

  • Logics. A person's acceptance of your arguments directly depends on the consistency of speech. It manifests itself in a clear connection between judgments, when one thought naturally follows from another and ultimately leads the interlocutor to the conclusion you need.
  • Stimulation. When persuading, choose arguments that affect your partner's personal interests and "promise" him advantages or threaten him with problems.
  • Reframing. This is a psychological technique for "turning" the meaning of a statement. Words are a shell of thought, but the same thought, expressed in different words, can change the meaning to the exact opposite. Thus, the words "scout" and "spy" have the same meaning, but completely different meanings.
  • Emotional coloring of speech. The degree of your persuasiveness largely depends on your personal interest and emotionality of speech.

All these methods will only work if your speech is understandable, expressive, distinguished by high culture and good vocabulary. The indistinct, confused mumbling of a person who has difficulty finding the right words will never be convincing.

How to persuade a person to do something: non-verbal means

It has long been noticed that with personal contact, it is easier to convince a person of something than by phone. It is even more difficult to do this in a written message. The fact is that non-verbal (non-verbal) means of communication play a huge role in the transmission of information. With their help, 60-80% of information is transmitted, and it is they who are able to influence the subconscious of a person, regardless of his desire.

There are many methods of psychological "tuning" of the interlocutor. Here are some of them.

  • Mirror. Unobtrusive repetition of your partner's movements sets him up to trust you.
  • Light touches. Psychologists believe that a person, in a conversation with someone he trusts, unconsciously tries to touch him from time to time. By touching the interlocutor, you thereby demonstrate your trust in him and set him up for a positive perception of you.
  • Smile. This universal means of communication has a positive effect on people and encourages them to relate with confidence in the interlocutor.
  • Expressive intonation. Convincing and positively colored intonation creates a special optimistic atmosphere. A person who speaks energetically and even cheerfully wants to believe.

Persuasiveness should not be confused with obsession. Too long attempts to convince the interlocutor cause him irritation and a reaction of rejection. Therefore, if you failed to persuade the person, then it is better not to insist and postpone the conversation until another convenient time.

How can you persuade a person? This question is asked by many people who want to learn how to defend their point of view. Convincing someone of something can sometimes seem like an extremely difficult task that cannot be compared with other efforts. The fact is that each individual has his own opinion on a particular issue. In order to be able to convey the necessary information to him, it is necessary to actualize the inner forces as much as possible. How to do it right? What kind of work is worth doing? Let's try to understand this difficult issue.

Reception of reflection

It consists in instilling the maximum degree of confidence in the opponent. This is the best way to gently and painlessly influence the situation. The reflection technique works in all cases when there is a desire to influence the situation. How to persuade a person?

You just need to try to speak his language. This is the best way to build trust in yourself. If you oppose your beliefs to your opponent, then it is unlikely that this will lead to a satisfactory result. Care must be taken to avoid going too far. All hypocrisy should be avoided, as it never leads to the desired goal.

To speak fast

The rate of speech also matters. This is not surprising, since in a conversation people subconsciously take this moment into account. If you speak quickly, without stretching the phrase, then the person will begin to listen more attentively to your words. A short, abrupt speech helps to increase concentration of attention, has a positive effect on the individual.

If the subject of the conversation concerns some important things, then it becomes much easier to convince a person of something. Fast speech forces the person to drop their thoughts and seriously focus on what is being said.

Soft questions

After thinking about how to properly persuade a person, make the decision to act unobtrusively. You can ask the interlocutor soft questions, which will prepare the opponent for a certain decision. It is best to try not to get into the soul right away, but to learn about everything gradually. Questions that require an affirmative answer work very well.

Compliments

How to persuade a person to do something? It is necessary to praise his personal qualities. It is recommended to say pleasant words without fail. This relaxes people and allows them to steer the conversation in the right direction. In this case, you do not need to be ashamed to pronounce words of praise: there are never many of them. Compliments are necessary in order to get closer to the very essence of a person. If an individual lets you get close, then most likely he will be able to persuade him to take certain actions.

Any praise almost always works flawlessly. The main thing is that the words are spoken with the necessary sincerity. Falseness is felt immediately, and a wise person is unlikely to respond to it. Deception destroys any relationship and contributes to the formation of mental coldness and rejection. Everyone wants to feel significant and self-sufficient. For this reason, you should try to act gently with patience.

Good mood

It is known that a smile is disarming like nothing else. When we share some of our energy with people, we get visible benefits in return. This is why it is so important to be able to maintain a good mood and be positive.

Try to control your own emotions, do not allow conflict situations to arise against the background of rejection of some points. How to persuade a person? It is necessary to sincerely smile at him, to strive to demonstrate good disposition towards him. Only in this case will your opponent start to trust you.

Useful business

When we do something good for the interlocutor, he begins to feel grateful. A useful activity forms a basis for a person to begin to listen to your words. A sense of gratitude fosters closeness between people. And only then you can use this feeling to try to bring him to a certain decision. But first, you should always try to give something important to the interlocutor. Only in this case he will listen to your words and, possibly, change his mind.

Benefits of the offer

If there is an intention to lead the individual to some kind of decision, then it is necessary to show the positive aspects of cooperation. It is necessary to demonstrate all the benefits of the offer, so much so that it was impossible to refuse it. A person can only agree because he becomes interested in learning about the visible benefits. If a person does not find anything beneficial for himself, then he is unlikely to delve into the details at all.

Nice appearance

People always pay attention to this, although sometimes they try to pretend that they are not interested in appearance. Having thought about how to persuade a person, you need to take care of your appearance. No one likes to talk to a slob in a greasy jacket. Attractive appearance is very disposed to oneself, contributes to the formation of trust. After the desired impression has arisen, you can submit any information. Charm is of great importance, it literally attracts people to itself.

Elderly people

How to persuade an elderly person? It is important to follow a few rules here. First, you should not try to force your position on them too actively. This will only cause rejection and further rejection. Second, you need to be prepared for rejection.

Older people are quite suspicious and will not want to waste time on things that will not be useful to them in the long run. It is necessary to present the proposal in such a way that it seems difficult to be correct, but also sounded rather noble. A person who has lived for many years in the world is very scrupulous about such concepts as honor and dignity. If you deceive him and do not keep this promise, he will stop believing you completely.

Thus, in the question of how to persuade a person, you need to be careful and adhere to common sense. It is necessary to act confidently and at the same time unobtrusively. The mood of the interlocutor and his willingness to accept offers from you are of great importance.

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